Prelogue
“Our intel is wrong. The planet is not uninhabited. Our scouts reports major Ork activity led by Warboss Dork.” – The two Squat leaders were standing in the observation lounge looking down at the small planet.
Thane Durgan Brom knew he was in charge. His logic told him—with no arrogance—that his experience and skills made him the right leader for this deep space mission.
Nevertheless, he felt like a child hoping for permission from Varnak Hest, the ancient Ancestor Lord standing by his side.
Hest said nothing. He held the silence for what seemed like an age to the ever-patient Thane. Then the old Squat spoke:
“Our intel is not wrong. It is out of date. But it matters not. We will retrieve the Tomb of Forgotten Grudges and add this Dork’s name to it in the process.”
“Let it be done. Bring me my Exo armour and Power Axe.” said the Thane Durgan nodding to Gurney Hogan, the young guard at the door, who quickly sounded the launch alert.
Last time Rune and I played, we faced our two Ork forces against each other, but this time I brought my Squats that my wife gave me for my 50th birthday a couple of years ago.
We also upped the points from 1.000 to 1.250 to bring a bit more ooomph and when I added up the Squates, my first pass gave me 1.249 points with all I had. I don’t think that has happened before.
Missions and strategy
We both drew “Assassins” while Rune drew “Barrage” and “Forced March” and I got “Malfunction” and “Saved!“… the last one I was very happy with, looking across the table towards the green wave.
Setup
Ork deployment
Rune set up first using his first Strategy Card “Forced March” moving his Snakebite Boar Boys forward on the right flank.
On the left flank he set up his Evil Sunz Warbikes with engines roaring ready to go fasta!
His Goff Skarboys unit, led by Warboss Dork, too kup the center flanked by the two Dreadnoughts with Gretchin and Oddboys for support.
His Blood Axe Kommandos had snuck ahead to the ruins on the left side to target the Squat Thuddgun.
Squat deployment
Squats were severely outnumbered. So I decided to go for the classic Blood Bowl “Cage” strategy keeping my forces together on my right side of the table.
Warrior Squad, “The Red Stripes”, took center position as first line of defence in front of the Exo-Armoured Hearth Guards led by Thane Durgan Brom with Varnak Hest, a lvl 3 Ancestor Lord Psyker by his side.
To the right I had Strike Squad “The Veterans”, led by “Sarge” a stout Hearth Guard in front of the Thudd Gun supported by Engineer Guildmaster, Dornik Holt.
And to my far right, I had Thunderer Squad, “Golden”, with a Multi Melta and Heavy Plasma Gun… more or least the only weapons with any realistic chance of blasting those Dreadnoughts.
The left side was further supported by young Gurney Hogan carrying the Battle Standard.
I can’t say i stepped into this battle with confidence.
Turn 1
Ork turn 1
The Ork horde went first and what a start!
Boar Boys continued down the right flank with the Warbike Boyz coming down the left. In the centre the Dreadnoughts moved forward and took a few shots with no casualties and all the Ork and Gretchin all ran towards the intruding Squats.
The Blood Axe Kommandos fired at the Strike Squad and the Thudd Gun, with no casualties.
The Warbikes struck first blood by killing three of the Thunderer Squad leaving only the two with the heavy weapons.
Squat turn 1
The Squats, surprised by the sheer speed of advance of the Ork, tried to reposition into a more tight defensive format.
Their weapons had no luck slimming down the green wave and to make matters worse, the Heavy Plasma Gun misfired and exploded in the hands of the Thunderer killing him and his last mate.
Frustrated by the lay of the land, the Ancestor Lord cast Mental Fortress.
Turn 2
Ork turn 2
The Boar Boys charged the ranks of Squat Warriors and Hearthguards into what would quickly become the focus of the battle.
Messy fight with losses on both sides no clear winner, but one Squat Warrior stood out who, in his Flak Armour, took the charge of two Boar Boys and not only survived, but managed to kill on with his trusty Las Pistol!
Having had no luck with shooting, the Dreadnoughts decided to run forward eager to join the fight.
The Warbike Boys and Blood Axe Kommandos blasted away at the Strike Squad wiping the entire squad except for the Hearthguard.
finally the Ork Weirdboy dispelled Mental Fortress.
Squat turn 2
The Thudd Gun aimed at the Skar Boys killing one but the rest of the shots fell the wrong way hitting a Dreadnought but with no chance to penetrate the armour.
Note to self, template weapons do not have to hit the front member of a target unit but can be placed more advantageously .
With the charge of the Boar Boys over, the Squats quickly gained the upperhand in close combat while keeping an eye on the advancing Dreadnoughts.
The Weirdboy turned to one of his Minders and said “I fink I’m gonna…” before vomiting pure warp in the face of the unlucky Minder whose head exploded on the spot.
Turn 3
At this point it was looking not looking good for the Squats. I was even kidding with Rune asking if his Orks wanted to surrender.
Ork turn 3
The dreaded Dreadnoughts rammed into the fray, but the Squats held their ground.
The Warbike Boys rushed pasted the lone Hearthguard and fired all their Auto Cannons at the Ancestor Lord, but with the help of the “Malfunction” Strategy Card, the Ancestor Lord was left standing with 2 wounds… and mad as hell!
The Orks called down a Barrage upon the lone Hearthguard, but the the aim drifted way off hitting nothing in the end.
In the psychic phase, the Weirdboy was still feeling a bit under the weather from the waaagh resulting in a full ‘Eadbang! killing him and several orks around him on the spot.
Squat turn 3
While the Squats still held the ground in close combat, the swarms of Skarboys and Gretchin was fast approaching.
The Hearthguard gripped their Power Axes with both hands and knocked away the legs under both Dreadnoughts rendering them both useless.
Thane Durgan Brom saw and opening and made a desperate lunge towards Dork, the Ork Warboss hoping to dispatch him and in doing so, routing the green wave.
But the Ork Warboss was a skilled fighter and his Mega Armour proved too much for Durgan’s Power Axe.
This were looking grim for the Squats.
“I’ve had it with this nonsense!” thought Varnak Hest, the Ancestor Lord, to himself.
He closed his eyes and summoned the Ultimate Force of his long dead predecessors and cast Hammer of Fury utterly Decimating the majority of Orks and Gretchin.
Before Hammer of Fury…
…and after Hammer of Fury
Turn 4
The Orks have fled and although they manage to rally at the very end, their losses were too great and the Squats had won.
counting victory point I think we ended with 7-11.
Epilogue
The few Squats left were eager to pursue the Orks and cut them down.
But Thane Durgan stopped them.
“They are leaving, but they are still a formidable enemy.”, he said with admiration.
“We’ve lost too many good men today. Let’s find the Book and be done with this planet.” said Lord Hest as he started walking in the opposite direction.
“Dis is our plannit!” grumbled Dork as he walked away with what was left of his scouting band. He had expected a few exploratory band of Squats, not a fully armed battle detachement.
“Wut are we gonna do, boss?” said one of his Skar Boys.
Dork slapped the wounded Skar boy across his face. “Wut you fink we’r gonna do? We go back to town and bring more of dem Boys and then we go back and smack dem stunties.”
And with a massive laugh Dork started chanting “”Ere we go, ‘ere we go, ‘ere we gooooooo!”